Lord! I don’t pray for strength, today. I don’t want to settle with an assertion that I am weak. I pray today, for you to wipe off these tears forever. I don’t seek solace from friends and family too. Of course, I love them and their incessant support means much. I just wish I never turn to them with my eyes damp, ever. I wish they never have to see me hurt and pushed.
I wish they never had to see me torn and battered now too. But sadly, I am here, in front of you, trounced and subjugated. I may seem to have lost in love. I may seem to have endured the torment hailed upon me. I was strong then and I am strong now. Then why don’t these tears ever stop flowing?
He may have outdone me in physical strength. He may have scarred me for life. He may have agonized the deep-rooted feelings I had for him. The moment I got the first whiplash was the moment I was free. I knew I am stronger. I knew I was liberated from the burden of loving him just as he was. I agree that it took me time to understand the power I had reserve. I know now, it was the fire within that burns the fuel for my survival.
I may not have many answers like why did he do that to me; like why did he have to unlove me; like why, after all the love in my heart went out to him, he had to batter me with his hatred. I surely don’t have the answer to why did I ever love him!
As I sit here before you, Lord, I pray that just like a piece of my heart died long ago, let the tears connected to it dry up as well. Amen!
This is my reaction to the news doing the rounds regarding domestic violence. My heart goes out to all those women who have to put up with this injustice every day.
This post is a part of the Ultimate Blog Challenge, July 2013