The most beautiful of the sights are to be seen with your eyes open. The most beautiful feelings are to be felt with your eyes closed. And sometimes, you are left confused as to what must be really done- close your eyes or keep them open. And in these moments all your eyes really do is wash themselves.
One such moment in my life was the birth of my child. The pink peachy baby that was shown to me while I lay listless on the table was taken away for observation instantly. By the time I recovered from the effect of anesthesia back to my senses, all I could ever imagine was seeing her delicate, frail face with my eyes closed. I told my husband that I wanted to look at her eyes. I was informed that she would stay in observation overnight and I would be able to see her the next morning only. I was tired and went back to sleep again, without as much as a submission.
The next morning, I woke up early, even before the sun rose. I called the nurse to ask if I could see my baby. I was informed that its only when the doctors come that I will know. My patience was giving way. All I ever wanted was to just look at her eyes and then they could take her back. My pleas were unanswered. Hours later the doctor walked in and began her regular checks with me when a nurse walked into the room with the baby wrapped in multiple blankets.
My eyes went straight to the AC vent and then the curtains of the window. I called out to my husband, ‘why don’t we shut the AC and draw the curtains, the baby might not like it’. The nurse responded to my curiosity ‘ No worries, she is fine. I’ll place her here on the cot while she sleeps, when she wakes up, call me and we will feed her then’. She placed the tiny body on the cot safely and walked out of the room then. The doctor suggested some more rest and advised me to stay in bed till the next day.
My husband gave me a glance and seeing my yearning eyes, pulled the cot closer to my bed. I smiled at him but I was still curious to hold her in my arms. He understood my anxiousness and lifted the baby carefully and placed her in my arms. The first time I held her in my arms, then, I don’t remember my heart skipping a beat but I am sure it did because I was now looking at the most beautiful thing I had seen ever. Just like every mother, I thought, my prayers answered in exactly as many words. She was perfection wrapped in blanket and I could not help myself but pinch her soft cheek to wake her up. She opened her eyes softly and I bet you (don’t even challenge me on that!) we made eye contact.
Suddenly so much of love swelled up in my heart that I could not help but cry. I remembered someone telling me this some time ago being a parent is the only time one gets to play God. I don’t know about that but I could hardly contain my happiness and felt godly. That one moment I knew I wanted to keep my eyes open as much as I wanted to close them. I wanted to feel the moment but did not want to miss even the slightest of her sight.
This post is a part of the Ultimate Blog Challenge, July 2013