With the first breath of our existence we are encouraged to be our best. 
‘Oh the baby did not cry!’
‘Oh the baby weighed only 1.7 pounds!’
‘Oh the baby is a tad bit darker than his parents’.
Give it a rest people; the baby just breathed her first!
In fact, our developmental milestones are compared with other babies – crawling, standing, walking, sleeping and the list goes on. Inadvertently, parents tend to make comparisons and then there are those ‘wise aunties’ who do not leave any opportunity to console in case the baby is a bit ‘late’ on her milestones.
Once you hit kindergarten, the parents and teachers are advised to look for signs in case the toddler is a gifted one. The kid’s quirks are measured efficiently and discussed in mom forums.
‘Mine does not eat too well.’
‘Mine is a nag in the evenings.’
‘Mine is aloof and does not mingle’.
And then there are tips provided by multiple books/websites under the segment – ‘How to manage your child’s tantrums’.
And this goes on from here well into her teens till the time she is an adult.
Not that I contest parents encouraging their child to be the best. Its the perception of ‘best’ that seems to have been misconstrued.
The point is when the child grows up, she wants outstanding from herself too. Because that’s what she knows she is supposed to aspire for. Nothing else is worth the efforts she puts into her way of life. Failures not only bring her down she becomes a target of her own skepticism. She gets into the trap of insecurity and her results start diminishing. That’s where exactly the need to be outstanding impairs us. It really does not help us grow but brings us further down in self-doubt.
Perfection is Perfect!!
Today when there are avenues far and wide to excel in areas of one’s interest, there are a gazillion people who are stuck in the rut, toiling their minds in exhausting sprints with each other. We are judged and compartmentalized in grades right from kindergarten till the end of our respective careers. Yes, that brings in meritocracy and hopefully that’s a great deal. It obviously believes in appreciating the one who’s a higher notch. However, there are some who still are seeking to be there. Their efforts go unnoticed and they land up being crushed. No wonder to attain something we need to go through some really uncomfortable terrain. However, that should not slow us or pull us down. It can be terrible that in the aspiration to be great we land up being a defeated pile of aversion.
Of course, I don’t have all the answers here myself, however, the truth is, we all want greatness. We all aspire. The catch is ‘don’t fall’. Don’t be who you want to be for others- do it for yourself!
We are usually better off than we think we are! Your do-it-yourself list may look something like this:
·       Value yourself just as you would want others to value you.
·       Nothing and no one decides how far you will go in life, but yourself.
·       Don’t let your faith in your abilities falter and take a step after another.
·       Trust yourself and keep moving.
·       Don’t be defeated by uncomfortable situations.
·       Be the finest you can be.  Be OUTSTANDING!

Image courtesy : Google


32 thoughts on “Outstanding

  1. No-one else can give me more of a hard time than I give myself these days. We all need to learn to be kinder to ourselves and as you've discussed our children if we have them. The message to myself after reading this post – Enjoy the good you can find in life, whatever it brings for you today.

  2. Swear to god ….. each n every word rings true big time …. we need to be less harsh n also learn to live with our own uniqueness instead of always trying to fit into a mold …… loved it ….

  3. Rightly said, There is so much pressure on everyone to perform with great capabilities but one needs is confidence.From A – Z April Challenge

  4. I've been pitched against my sister my whole life, and I've always come out second best. Even when I passed my driving test first time, even when I graduated university with a higher score, there was still a reason why I was somehow second best. I beat my brains out trying to impress my Mum.Then one day, I just gave up. Resigned to being second place. I started trying to impress myself instead, and I've never been happier!coffintreehill.tumblr.com

  5. Very well put – I don't know about other cultures, but us Indians are first in the beeline to 'compare and contrast' especially kids, and especially their looks. You passed on such a precious message. We are all unique and comparing ourselves to others is the biggest disservice we could do to ourselves.

  6. We don't deliver kids these days… we breed racers in life… its sad…I try my bestest to not force the lil one into anything… we try to reason and if he finds it reasonable he does it 🙂

  7. I so agree with you. Husband and I make it a point to appreciate everything we do on a daily basis. We hope we do it for our kids too. being perfect is just in the mind. You must be perfect at heart 🙂

  8. A great post, i agree with everything you have said, comparison kills, I have even students at PG Level, compare themselves, become sad, nurture negative thinking and become depressed, very well written, Thanks for sharing !

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